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"People say that we’re all seeking a meaning for life.... I think what we’re really seeking is an experience of being alive, so that our life experiences on the purely physical plane will have resonance within our innermost being and reality, so that we can actually feel the rapture of being alive."
Joseph Campbell
“We do not grow absolutely, chronologically. We grow sometimes in one dimension, and not in another; unevenly. We grow partially. We are relative. We are mature in one realm, childish in another. The past, present, and future mingle and pull us backward, forward, or fix us in the present. We are made up of layers, cells, constellations.”
Anais Nin
“Look at a stone cutter hammering away at his rock, perhaps a hundred times without as much as a crack showing in it. Yet at the hundred-and-first blow it will split in two, and I know it was not the last blow that did it, but all that had gone before.”
Jacob A. Riis
“It was a good place for getting lost in, a city no one ever knew, a city explored from the neutral heart outward, until after many years, it defined itself into a jumble of clearings separated by stretches of the unknown...”
Andre Deutsch
photo by E.F.D.J.“Remember, the mind likes to assume it "know what it knows" but often its perceptions are just not accurate. Yet strong judgments are made all the time based on limited information...When we judge someone and then adopt an attitude toward them, that shuts down other possibilities and locks us away from the insight of our hearts.”
Doc Childre and Howard Martin
I was reminded today, by a wise and practicing Buddhist, about the art of observing and seeing others with the heart, rather than knee jerking to assessments based in personal opinion.
As a social worker, there are very fine lines between our learned/practiced skills and our personal and professional intuitive skills. We are trained to be open and non-judgmental to all those we meet. We are also trained to assess people and their situations, with the goal of empowerment and healing. With our ingrained “assessor” hat always on, the process of receiving and interpreting information is so swift, we often miss how that process and conclusion actually occurs within us.
“It is then that you will hear a voice within yourself. It was there all the time, but you never listened before.
Faintly it will speak to you at first, but it will grow louder and clearer the more you take heed of its message
until one day it thunders inside you and you will have come home.”
Rusty Berkus
“To live in this world you must be able to do three things: to love what is mortal; to hold it against your bones knowing your own life depends on it; and, when the time comes to let it go, to let it go.”
-Mary Oliver-
Photo by grassrootsmsw“The arms of love encompass you with your present, your past, your future, the arms of love gather you together.”
Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
photo by J.A.S.“Actually, we have no problems -
We have opportunities for which we should give thanks…
An error we refuse to correct has many lives.
It takes courage to face one's own shortcomings
and wisdom to do something about them.”
Edgar Cacye
“One doesn’t discover new lands
Without consenting to lose sight of the shore
For a very long time.”
Andre Gide
“I know for certain that we never lose the people we love, even to death. They continue to participate in every act, thought and decision we make. Their love leaves an indelible imprint in our memories. We find comfort in knowing that our lives have been enriched by having shared their love.”
Leo Buscaglia
“I hope that my achievements in life shall be these: that I will have fought for what was right and fair; that I will have risked for that which mattered; and that I will have given help to those who were in need… that I will have left the Earth a better place for what I've done and who I've been.”
C. Hoppe
“Aging is not 'lost youth' but a new stage of opportunity and strength.”
Betty Friedan
"Which road do I take?" she asked.
"Where do you want to go?" responded the Cheshire cat.
"I don't know,"
"Then," said the cat, "it doesn't matter."
“Do not depend on the hope of results. You may have to face the fact that your work will be apparently worthless and even achieve no result at all, if not perhaps results opposite to what you expect. As you get used to this idea, you start more and more to concentrate not on the results, but on the value, the rightness, the truth of the work itself. You gradually struggle less and less for an idea and more and more for specific people. In the end, it is the reality of personal relationship that saves everything.”
Thomas Merton
“New York City, the incomparable, the brilliant star city of cities, the forty-ninth state, a law unto itself, the Cyclopean Paradox, the inferno with no-out-of bounds, the supreme expression of both the miseries and the splendors of contemporary civilization, the Macedonia of the United States. It meets the most severe test that may be applied to definition of a metropolis ¾ it stays up all night. But also it becomes a small town when it rains.”
“When I stopped seeing my mother with the eyes of a child, I saw the woman who helped me give birth to myself.”
Lifetime, institutional bureaucrats
don't believe in 'magic.'
The realm of the unknown and unquantifiable,
is unsafe to their
procedure and result oriented mind.
How sad,
that they will go through their lives,
having missed the beauty and depth
of humanity;
and never experience the 'magic.'
Theirs is a constricted world;
based in a false sense
of safety and security.
In the end,
Numbers and formulaic strategies
are just that...
logical entities.
In the end,
it is our humanity,
in all of it's intricacy and complexity,
that remains and whispers to us,
"Have you seen the magic? Do you see it now? Can you feel it?
What does it reveal to you? What lessons have you learned from it?
Who are you, because of the magic?"
Why wait till the end?
“Snowflakes are one of nature’s most fragile things, but just look what they can do when they stick together.”
-
“At the height of laughter, the universe is flung into a kaleidoscope of new possibilities.”
Jean Houston
Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind.
"Pooh!" he whispered.
"Yes, Piglet?"
"Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's paw.
"I just wanted to be sure of you."
A.A. Milne
“Do not go where the path may lead,
go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Today, the wisest and most skilled social worker I know, completed her final working day at ‘The Casino.’ During her 9 dedicated years, she created healing changes for patients, families, and co-workers. Her innate talent and gifts are countless and they leave a reverberating effect. With judiciousness, empathy, and a savvy shrewdness she taught me that barriers exist, only to be surmounted.
The field of social work and the
G.D….take time to rejuvenate and nurture your spirit…I look forward to witnessing your new blazing trail…Here is a quote, in honor of you:
“The visionary is the one who brings his or her voice into the world and who refuses to edit, rehearse, perform, or hide. It is the visionary who knows that the power of creativity is aligned with authenticity.”
Angeles Arrien
“You think you can
Depend on tails.
You don't expect tails
To go wrong.
The last time I looked
It was right there.
Now when I look there,
It's gone.
It was always
Just behind me,
Always tagging along.
A little something
at the back...
I thought it was there,
And it's gone.
I assumed it was
Attached to me,
That it actually
Hung true.
I'd hoped it was stuck
Very firmly on.
Maybe we needed
Some glue.
It used to trail
Right behind me,
Always tailing along.
My little extra
At the back...
I thought it was there,
Now it's gone.”
by Hallie
Eeyore "Lessons from the Hundred-Acre Wood"
photo by grassrootsmsw“It may be that when we no longer know what to do,
We have come to our real work.
And that when we no longer know which way to go,
We have come to our real journey.
The mind that is not baffled, is not employed.
The impeded stream is the one that sings.”
-Wendell Berry-
"We all start out with no discipline, no patience, no perseverance, no determination. We all start out at zero. People say, ‘You have talent.’ No, the gift is to realize that we all start out even. Whether we messed up or put our best foot forward, with these four qualities, we take care of our mental, physical and spiritual health each day. Am I the best in the world? No. The question is: Am I the best I can be?"
Edward James Olmos
photo by grassrootsmsw“This bridge will only take you halfway there, to those mysterious lands you long to see. Through gypsy camps and swirling Arab fair, and moonlit woods where unicorns run free. So come and walk awhile with me and share the twisting trails and wondrous worlds I’ve known. But this bridge will only take you halfway there. The last few steps you have to take alone.”
Shel Silverstein
“But the adult is not the highest stage of development. The end of the cycle is that of the independent, clear-minded, all-seeing Child. That is the level known as wisdom. When the Tao te Ching and other wise books say things like, "Return to the beginning; become a child again" that's what they are referring to. Why do the enlightened seem filled with light and happiness like children? Why do they sometimes even look and talk like children? Because they are. The wise are Children Who Know. Their minds have been emptied of the countless minute somethings of small learning and filled with the great wisdom of the Great Nothing, the Way of the Universe.”
-Benjamin Hoff-
“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.”
Leo Buscaglia
A kind full presence is one of the greatest gifts we have to offer another. Whether it is our child, a loved one, or one of our clients/patients.
Today, the simple act of bringing a sandwich to the spouse of a patient, brought out the most beautiful and radiant smile...
"How did you know I hadn't planned for my dinner tonight?" he asked.
His words and reaction struck me so deeply and tenderly. What seemed effortless on my part, meant so much more to the receiver. In one swift moment, our connection deepened and reached another level of understanding.
We may not always know how or when we can help another, but if we come forth with kindness in our beings, we allow these opportunities and gifts to be possible.
“If your heart or spirit holds a frail seedling, protect it at all costs. Often we hear that it is good to trust, and that it is wicked to distrust, and so we put our tenderest being in the hands of those who are unable to hold us gently, because they themselves were never held so.”
C.P. Estes
"I think I could turn and live with animals, they are so placid and self-contained, I stand and look at them long and long."
“Live life fully while you’re here. Experience everything. Take care of yourself and your friends. Have fun, be crazy, be weird. Go out and screw up! You’re going to anyway, so you might as well enjoy the process. Take the opportunity to learn from your mistakes: find the cause of your problem and eliminate it. Don’t try to be perfect; just be an excellent example of being human.”
-Anthony Robbins-
All Fathers have their own history…
Their own unique life narrative…
developed and created
who they are.
Designing and shaping:
their strengths, their weaknesses;
their views, their insights;
their survival mechanisms, their coping abilities.
into their psyche,
long before we arrived,
as their children.
The curtain rose…
They found themselves center stage,
in the role of ‘father,’
and the script had yet to be written.
we may gurgle and
reach our chubby arms out to the familiar face of ‘Dad,’
when he reaches into our crib,
to relieve us from a soggy diaper.
we begin to perform acts
that trigger smiles
on our father’s faces.
create reactions.
Our journey of yearning for
approval and acceptance
LAUNCHES…
we start to develop our distinctive identities,
and LOUDLY stamp our feet,
for acknowledgement of our individuality.
to be seen and heard,
in our new, self-found,
audacious character.
All the while, seeking and yearning
for support and veneration.
is baffling to our fathers…
Time has made them forget,
that they too,
were once the child of a father.
Child and father; Father and adult child,
Reframe their thoughts and opinions?
because he wants to protect.
Maybe a father lets you fall flat on your face,
because he wants you
to learn,
and TRY AGAIN.
lets you find your own way,
by allowing you to make mistakes…
Even if his heart hurts silently,
for your pain.
admonishes your life choices,
because he has your best interests at heart.
Maybe a father doesn’t want to watch you
recreate his own mistakes.
to shine and succeed.
Maybe he doesn’t know how to express that.
Or maybe,
we children,
are too determined and willful, in our self convictions…
We can’t hear a father’s pleas and heartfelt hopes.
that one day,
Father and child can recognize
each other,
as equal adults;
With their own valid reasons and purposes.
Father and child will just sit,
And REALLY listen.
Just listen,
and honor that, which is the other’s story.
can lead to a profound and transformative opening.
Healing, deep wisdom, and rites of passage
Await.
may be discovered…
In their
individual and collective,
deep rooted,
and long standing
LIFE STORIES.
"I am a fox," said the fox. "Come and play with me," proposed the little prince. "I am so unhappy." "I cannot play with you," the fox said. "I am not tamed." "Ah! Please excuse me," said the little prince. But, after some thought, he added: "What does that mean, 'tame'?"
"It is an act too often neglected," said the fox. It means to establish ties." "'To establish ties'?" "Just that," said the fox. "To me, you are still nothing more than a little boy who is just like a hundred thousand other little boys. And I have no need of you. And you, on your part, have no need of me. To you, I am nothing more than a fox like a hundred thousand other foxes. But if you tame me, then we shall need each other. To me, you will be unique in all the world. To you, I shall be unique in all the world..." "I am beginning to understand," said the little prince. "There is a flower... I think that she has tamed me..."
"Nothing is perfect," sighed the fox. But he came back to his idea. "My life is very monotonous," the fox said. "I hunt chickens; men hunt me. All the chickens are just alike, and all the men are just alike. And, in consequence, I am a little bored. But if you tame me, it will be as if the sun came to shine on my life . I shall know the sound of a step that will be different from all the others. Other steps send me hurrying back underneath the ground. Yours will call me, like music, out of my burrow. And then look: you see the grain-fields down yonder? I do not eat bread. Wheat is of no use to me. The wheat fields have nothing to say to me. And that is sad. But you have hair that is the colour of gold. Think how wonderful that will be when you have tamed me! The grain, which is also golden, will bring me back the thought of you. And I shall love to listen to the wind in the wheat..."
The fox gazed at the little prince, for a long time. "Please, tame me!" he said. "I want to, very much," the little prince replied. "But I have not much time. I have friends to discover, and a great many things to understand." "One only understands the things that one tames," said the fox. "Men have no more time to understand anything. They buy things all ready made at the shops. But there is no shop anywhere where one can buy friendship, and so men have no friends any more. If you want a friend, tame me..."
So the little prince tamed the fox. And when the hour of his departure drew near... "Ah," said the fox, "I shall cry." "It is your own fault," said the little prince. "I never wished you any sort of harm; but you wanted me to tame you..." "Yes, that is so," said the fox. "But now you are going to cry!" said the little prince. "Yes, that is so," said the fox. "Then it has done you no good at all!" "It has done me good," said the fox, "because of the color of the wheat fields." And then he added: "Go and look again at the roses. You will understand now that yours is unique in all the world. Then come back to say goodbye to me, and I will make you a present of a secret." ...
"Goodbye," said the fox. "And now here is my secret, a very simple secret: It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye." "What is essential is invisible to the eye," the little prince repeated, so that he would be sure to remember. "It is the time you have wasted for your rose that makes your rose so important." "It is the time I have wasted for my rose..." said the little prince, so that he would be sure to remember. "Men have forgotten this truth," said the fox. "But you must not forget it. You become responsible, forever, for what you have tamed. You are responsible for your rose..." "I am responsible for my rose," the little prince repeated, so that he would be sure to remember.
The Little Prince - Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
“Becoming and being are the yin and yang of our lives. One inner one outer. Today, we value becoming to the exclusion of being; we applaud human becomings. The secret is balance.”
-Author Unknown-
Transformation contains both
change and constancy,
movement and stagnation,
development and decay,
life and death,
grief and bliss.
Embrace
these uneven rythyms,
as ultimately and unexpectedly,
they unite;
creating our whole SELF.
We cannot understand
emptiness,
if we haven't experienced
fullness.
We cannot expand,
if we haven't encountered and felt
contraction.
Balance the paradoxes
within yourself.
Accept it in those
you meet.
If we acknowledge
these truths,
all things
can come into focus,
bringing
vital clarity.
-grassrootsmsw-
-Claudia Ghandi-
“Who’s your daddy?”
I am thinking of you today… your birthday. I miss you, beyond what I can put into words. When I long for your presence, I find solace in the beautiful poem that your dear friend, Barry Morrow, wrote the day you left us:
“Late this afternoon, while the world kept on spinning, in a wooden house in a small corner of
All in time.
It seems certain that one day science and religion will agree: From the stars we came; to the stars we owe all of life's creation, and from thence we shall return. Because we are Stardust. We are Golden. And we will meet back in the Garden.
All in time.
Dear Hearts and Gentle People, hold close to that which was Barry, and tighter still to that which is Sheri, for she carries upon her slender shoulders, for all of us, a great and abiding sorrow.”
-Barry Morrow/Nov. 9, 2004-
Still waiting for the white horses B…and letting it be…just BE…and only you know why. ‘All in time’, I imagine.
My dearest and most faithful guardian…thank you for having shared in my life and eternally changing it. You tended to wounds with compassion; you nourished the empty spaces; you gently cultivated what felt lost; you unknowingly played a role that was needed and historically malnourished; and you revealed the beauty of unconditional love and trust.
I cradle all the gifts you imparted to me, and I hope to pass them on in my life… always, in honor of you, my dear BAAAZZZER.
"Psychically, it is good to make a halfway place, a way station, a considered place in which to rest and mend after one escapes a famine. It is not too much to take one year, two years, to assess one's wounds, seek guidance, apply the medicines, consider the future. A year or two is scant time. The feral woman is a woman making her way back. She is learning to wake up, pay attention, stop being naïve, uninformed. She takes her life in her own hands. To re-learn the deep feminine instincts, it is vital to see how they were decommissioned to begin with."
Clarissa Pinkola Estes
Where, when and how
do we cage
our unspoken, hidden secrets?
are truths;
based in self integrity.
to ourselves.
PROFOUND,
MULTIFACETED,
ENTRENCHED.
to the organic flow
that has created
our current, individual reality?
have built and concreted
the sources of our SECRETS.
our long internal slumber,
and then,
own our righteous behavior?
our own RESOLUTION?
To our self promises, oaths and pledges.
yet intricately complicated feat,
can give us
Redemption,
Emancipation,
and Liberation.
This is about uncaging…
Releasing and accepting.
our own
meanings of
Dedication,
Loyalty,
Sincerity,
and Truth.
photo by grassrootsmsw
"The voice of the sea is seductive; never ceasing, whispering, clearing, murmuring, inviting the soul to wander for a spell in the abysses of solitude; to lose itself in mazes of inward contemplation. The voice of the sea speaks to the soul. The touch of the sea is sensuous, enfolding the body in its soft, close embrace."
Kate Chopin
We provide an absolute presence at the bedside.
We open ourselves to the experiences and moments
of our patients and families.
Even with practiced, professional boundaries,
We often get lost...
In the deep, swirling, rawness
of other's authentic grief and loss.
We have been gifted
as witnesses,
to life altering moments.
We have been allowed in,
to the most intimate and sacred.
Unconscious shifts occur within us;
and then, we dream.
In dreaming,
we cannot attach logic...
we can only receive the emotive senses
that have blotted our psyche.
We dream of aloneness and
groundlessness.
We absorb the emotions
we have observed;
and our own fears and sadnesses
are awakened.
The unknown and unsettling,
knocks at our door...
asking us to listen,
bravely and compassionately.
Sit and wait.
Listen...
honor this opening
to your depths.
Remarkable lessons and insights
may be revealed.
-grassrootsmsw-
Author Unknown
Next fall when you see geese heading south for the winter flying along in a "V" formation, you might be interested in knowing what science has discovered about why they fly that way. It has been learned that as each bird flaps its wings, it creates an uplift for the bird immediately following. By flying in a "V" formation, the whole flock adds at least 71% greater flying range than if each bird flew on its own. People who share common direction and sense of community can get where they are going quicker and easier, because they are traveling on the thrust of one another.
When a goose falls out of formation, it suddenly feels the draft and resistance of trying to go it alone, and quickly gets into formation to take advantage of the lifting power of the bird immediately in front. If we have as much sense as a goose, we will stay in formation with those who are headed the same way we are going.
When the lead goose gets tired, he rotates back in the wing and another goose flies point. It pays to take turn doing hard jobs.
The geese honk from behind to encourage those up front to keep up their speed. An encouraging word goes a long way.
Finally, when a goose gets sick, or is wounded by a gun shot and falls out, two geese fall out of formation and follow him until he is either able to fly or until he is dead, then they launch out on their own or with another formation to catch up with the group. If we have the sense of a goose, we will stand by each other like that.
“Events in our lives happen in a sequence in time, but in their significance to ourselves they find their own order in the continuous thread of revelation.”
Eudora Welty
INTERNATIONAL PEACE DAY....PLEASE COME AND TELL A FRIEND
CANDLE LIGHT VIGIL ...BRING A CANDLE & LIGHTER!!!!
THIS THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 21 AT 6:30PM
COURTHOUSE SUNKEN GARDENS
Let there be peace on earth, and let peace begin with me. Let peace begin
with me. That may not be what the United Nations had in mind when it passed
a resolution in 1981 to establish the International Day of Peace. The United
Nations General Assembly decided that it would be appropriate "to devote a
specific time to concentrate the efforts of the United Nations and its
Member States, as well as of the whole of mankind, to promoting the ideals
of peace and to giving positive evidence of their commitment to peace in all
viable ways... (The International Day of Peace) should be devoted to
commemorating and strengthening the ideals of peace both within and among
all nations and peoples."
At the time the Resolution and a later amended version making September 21
the official day of peace passed, the emphasis was on the cessation of
hostilities. In Santa Barbara we have held marches and rallies expressing
our opposition to war. But not this year. Mother Teresa said ""I was once
asked why I don't participate in anti-war demonstrations. I said that I will
never do that, but as soon as you have a pro-peace rally, I'll be there."
What's the difference? Perhaps Noble Peace Prize Laureate Máiread Corrigan
Maguire said it best. "We frail humans are at one time capable of the
greatest good and, at the same time, capable of the greatest evil. Change
will only come about when each of us takes up the daily struggle ourselves
to be more forgiving, compassionate, loving and above all joyful in the
knowledge that, by some miracle of grace, we can change as those around us
can change too."
For those who feel similarly we offer an inspiring program that will nourish
and elevate the spirit. Beginning at 6:30 p.m. at the Courthouse Sunken
Gardens (Anapamu and Anacapa streets), there will be a proclamation of peace
by Mayor Blum, words of hope and peace by the Reverend Mark Asman,
Babatunde Folayemi, Stephen Sherrill and the Reverend Karen Weingard.
Live music will be provided by some exceptional local talent - Lisa Lavie and
Lois Mahalia,and Melissa Ramsey-Demeter, as well as Los Angeles recording artist
DionMial backed by the Center of the Heart Band featuring: Eje` Lynn-Jacobs,
George Friedenthal, Chris Judge, James Spitzer and Chris Thomas. At the
close of the program, there will be a silent candle light vigil.
This is an event for people of all ages, faiths and political affiliations.
A place where we believe that a small group of thoughtful committed citizens
can change the world. Just like President Dwight David Eisenhower said, "in
the goodness of time, all peoples will come to live together in a peace
guaranteed by the binding force of mutual respect and love." That's how we
plan to celebrate peace.
“We're all stumbling towards the light
with varying degrees of grace at any given moment.”
Bo Lozoff
photo by grassrootsmswPLANT IMPOSSIBLE GARDENS
Look forward to dreams. Cry during movies.
Swing as high as you can on a swingset, by moonlight.
Cultivate moods.
Do it for love. Take lots of naps.
Take moonbaths.
Giggle with children.
Listen to old people.
Drive away fear. Play with everything.
Entertain your inner child.
Build a fort with blankets.
Get wet. Hug trees. Write love letters.
photo by grassrootsmsw
photo by grassrootsmsw
“But nothing worth having comes without some kind of fight –Got to kick at the darkness 'til it bleeds daylight...”
~Bruce Cockburn
